11.07.03 | 4:17 p.m.

Now for a word on public restrooms.

It seems that fiber is in the air at my office, since every time I have ventured into the bathroom today, I have been in the presence of a pooper. I understand people take shits. It's a normal bodily function. However, for women (at least), taking a crap during her nine-to-five stint is never something to look forward to. Unless you are talking about my office, where poops are prided.

That's all fine and dandy, but to have to pee between to noisy and foul smelling poopers, like I did earlier today, is just plain cruel.

I propose to fix this situation that there be two women's restrooms. Door #1 and Door #2.

That way, everyone wins.