01.29.04 | 2:12 p.m.

I just had a flashback.

Back in the fifth grade, my mother, in preparation for sending her child (that would be me) away to sleepover camp, purchased me a few new pairs of underwear -- a normal motherly activity.

It was when my mother felt the need to tell me to be sure and take the underwear off its little plastic hangers before packing it in my duffel bag or else ‘the other kids would think I was a freak’ that any normalcy boundaries were crossed.

I did take the underwear off the hangers.

Makes me think my mother in her youth maybe wasn’t provided this ‘tip’, thus scarring her for life with horrible childhood memories of being mocked and called "Mary Hanger Panties" by all the cruel and insensitive kiddie campers…